Monday, March 31, 2008

when the death of your civilization precedes you

3) Slouching towards Mecca

The foreign man stood in front of the terminal waiting for his plane to touch down. A flight attendant with brown hair pulled back tight against her head walked up to him. She was an employee for Delta and kept ten pairs of adhesive wings in her left pocket at all times. The wings created a slight bulge on her hip. She did not like this.

"May I help you find something, sir?" she asked the man. She was nervous because the man was standing instead of sitting and more importantly because he was brown.

"No, I am just waiting. Thank you," he returned. This did nothing to settle the nerves of the flight attendant. She thought horrible things: gum stick arson, pant leg shotgun.

"Okay." The flight attendant was clearly shaken. The foreign man felt sick. He looked at his watch and left the terminal. He walked down a wide hallway toward a magazine stand to get a bottle of water and a packet of gum. From the ceiling of the hallway hung flags of almost every country he could think of. The biggest one was one that had been centered at the end of the hallway back by his terminal. It was the flag for the United States of America. As he went down the hall, he saw adults staring at him. Some just kept their eyes wide; others let their mouths purse up and turn away quickly.

The foreign man walked back to the terminal and stood in his original spot. He uncapped the bottle of water and took it all in one long, satisfying gulp. He set the bottle down and upon raising himself back upright spied a couple watching his movements. He felt like an animal at a zoo. He felt like the new kid in school. He still felt sick.

A voice over the intercom rang thru the terminal telling the passengers that the flight to Boston would be delayed two hours. The voice apologized. The foreign man looked around and decided he could not wait for the plane.

One hour later, things were different. Things were different, and the foreign man did not feel sick.

4) “Dude, I have a blog. You have to see it. It’s really sick.”

“What kind of stuff do you post on there?”

“Just like….all types a random shit.”

“Oh, uh…”

“Oh shit, and I’m doing this writing contest too. Its gonna be really sick. Everyone pays like 5 bucks to enter it and then the winner gets like, however much money there is after everyone enters. Dude, you should be in it.”

“Fuck. I’m down. Here’s 5 bucks, I’m gonna grab another beer.”

“Will you grab me a shot of SoCo?”


Sunday, March 30, 2008

the money will roll right in

The $ first annual morethangalenandmiles writing contest $ begins today. I'll be posting two numbered entries each day until the first round is done. all the contestants + me get to vote afterwards and then the next round starts.

Round 1, Fight

1) Why Bad Things Happen To Good People

Life's not fair. A sentiment most people believe in. Why did my grandpa die of cancer? Why did my friend get hurt in a car wreck? Why was that girl just messing with me? Why does my school/job suck?

Life's not fair. That's what we think.

What is fair anyways? The dictionary says it is "free from bias".

In a perfect world good things would always happen to good people and bad things would always happen to bad people. Sounds right, right? Unfortunately that would be about the most unfair and selfish thing that you could wish for.

Why do you hold doors open for strangers? Why do you write your mom a birthday card? Why do you complement a friend? You aren't guaranteed anything tangible for doing so. Who's to say that stranger doesn't make a sarcastic remark, your mom doesn't appreciate the card, your friend doesn't make fun of you. You do it anyways, not for yourself but for the betterment of someone else.

But what if we lived in that perfect world. That stranger, your mom, and your friend aren't rude to you. They avoid something bad happening to them and you are rewarded for doing good. Sounds good right? But this is where things get muddy.

Have you ever seen a trained dog? Like the one's you see at county fairs or half time shows of sporting events. They can do just about anything from catching frisbees to backflips. What happens after every trick? They get a dog treat. How is that much different from the perfect world mentioned above? Do good, receive good. Do bad, receive bad.

If that was the case how could we ever trust anyone's motivations, including ourselves. If good was always rewarded and bad always punished what would we be left with? A world full of selfishness and artifice? A world full of dogs looking for treats?

Maybe that stranger didn't deserve your politeness, maybe your mom was a bad parent, maybe your friend wasn't really your friend, but you still did it anyway with no conditions or bias. You did it because sometimes good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people.

You did it because life is fair.

2) The shitty apartment in the L.A. sun—the cracked linoleum, the dust, the scum spreading from corners out to the walls, to the air, unchecked, all blaring in Technicolor—was crueler than squalor in shade. But, he had never lived in squalor before L.A., and he was hardly living now. Down 60 pounds from his usual 170 (he was always slight in his family’s chunky, meat-head lineup), he struggled to breathe in the rancid air and a small part of him, an iota of misplaced rationality, was glad—relieved, even—that he had blocked out the searing light weeks before, just before he stopped going out, stopped delivering flowers, stopped altogether.

But, he wasn’t, when he twisted the white plastic tube dangling by the one dirty window and reduced the sun to slits, keeping out the sun. He was armoring himself against prying eyes and against the little black lines in their scopes—but the private investigator his mother had hired was still on the east coast, and the voodoo doctor in Nicaragua, his old blue jacket in hand, had impaled Oklahoma with a pushpin. There was no one else.

The sunshine crept in when they opened the door and snipped the rusting chain. It crawled back to illuminate the mess, the papers, the rat droppings, it crept in to jeer at its vanquisher. But, for so long he had been gone.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

everybody's trying to make us another cool decade of fakers
art star ryan chin!
beer and hot choco!
thanks miles

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Sunday, March 23, 2008

So you wanna build an altar on a summer night / you wanna smoke the gel off a fentanyl patch


do they need an extra large tanning bed for the big kid? what does it actually look like inside of one?
leftovers 4 days

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

what shall we do tomorrow? what shall we ever do?

the field is full, sorry slowpokes. here are the 16 contenders in the 2008 first annual $ morethangalenandmiles $ writing contest. they have until wednesday the 26th to send in their first entries, so it'll get started immediately after that.

Luc Clements is the 8th grader i don't babysit.

Jake Fournier is an nyu student that marcelle found for me.

Helen Manning is another nyu student that marcelle found for me.

Lindsey Dowswell is another nyu student that marcelle found for me. i think all three of them have read in search of lost time.

Amalia Child is in my creative writing class.

Chris Francis made the classic Indiana skateboarding video The Other Side of Things.

Pete Cavanaugh is my best writing friend from Indiana.

Matt Zwiesler is my best friend.

Sam Newell only started skating a year and a half ago but is more down to rip than almost anyone.

Max Palmer is from Ohio and rides the loosest trucks I know.

Jack Greer once skated to "Gravel Pit" in his skate video part.

Todd Jordan is a pro skater!

Ted Barrow had a really good part in Lurkers 2 and is from Texas.

Jared Campbell is my best high school friend and goes to William & Mary.

Joey Calavenna is my roommate.

Dean Levin loves max fish.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

krom update!

so the other night they're chilling at the moontower. someone talks some girl into pissing in a cup and from there it isn't much a stretch to talk krom into drinking her piss. he takes it down like a champ, but then it makes him throw up. bummer, so there's vomit all over the kitchen floor of the moontower, and it's basically a mixture of piss and whatever else krom throws up. then someone tells krom that he should lick that up. so he gets down on his hands and knees and tongue to floor! get em! so once that's taken care of, he also eats a bunch of garlic powder and snorts a couple lines of it! yeah krom!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

rise video!

francis took some photos at the premiere
want more of little corey? and other shredders?

Thursday, March 13, 2008

"convenience is the name of the game
self indulgence is the rule, selfish mutherfuckers.
there are no winners
we all lose
thanks for nothing"

from "money" by embrace

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

if you like where you are
you don't need a car

if you aren't in pain
you don't need a plane

Monday, March 10, 2008

i'm wide awake it's morning

local homeless crew
this is what happens when your board gets run over by a truck
this is what happens when you don't get into nyu grad school

Saturday, March 8, 2008

get along,

get along, kid charlemagne!

i got a new camera, but before i go back to posting like that, here is steely dan shredding through an epic rendition of one of their classics:

Thursday, March 6, 2008

there won't be blood

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

Sunday, March 2, 2008

last call

okay so half of the field is filled with paid entrants for $ the first annual morethangalenandmiles short writing contest $! and the field is stacking up pretty sick!! i'll give brief contestant bios once i have everyone paid. that means that if you want to participate there is still space so long as you make plans to get the money to me immediately. i guarantee fun!